Caring: A shift in perspective
Today is my last day for a couple of weeks as I am off to Amrit Nam Sarovar in France early tomorrow for a week with my family and a week of level 2 yoga teacher training. Please give yourself some time and space to unwind each day and get in contact with how you are and just breathe with it.
As I was wondering what I would write this week, I remembered Ajahn Brahm, a Theravadan Buddhist monk who I saw last year and whose stories I found very thought-provoking. He told the story of a young doctor who couldn't save a young wife and mother and had to inform the husband. The doctor came to him and said: "I can’t do this job anymore, it is too painful when you fail". Ajahn Brahm asked "What is your job aim? If it is to heal you will fail a lot. If it is to care you never need fail and you will heal more people." A shift in intention, in perspective, can suddenly free everything up. And then Ajahn Brahm offered these three pieces of advice:
- When is the most important time? Now. Now is the only time you have.
- Who is the most important person? The person in front of you is always the most important person.
- What is the most important thing to do? To care.
You cannot always help, you may not always agree, but you can always care. And if you care you will want to listen, to give this person your undivided non-judgemental attention that is not seeking to change this person, just to understand.
And wouldn't it be lovely to be able to do that all the time, or even just some of the time? And this is exactly what you are practising when you are meditating. Patiently bringing the mind back to this moment, to yourself, giving it your undivided attention (well at least for a breath or two!). Practising allowing whatever is here without judgements (including allowing the judgemental thoughts!) Practising allowing yourself to be whoever you are right now and just feeling it, just being with it with great kindness. The more you practise the more you are able to offer this to others. To me, that is the greatest gift you can give someone.
“Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.”